Becoming a Hignight

I love E's family so incredibly much! For the past few years his family would claim me in a heartbeat. I feel the same way but tonight it has really settled in. I'm going to be a Hignight. I mean I will still always be a part of the Churchill/Alsbrook/Moore clan but I will be a Hignight. Tonight this hit home, I am sitting with MJ as she has broken her ankle on both sides of it. I would sit up with anyone while they are in pain, I'm overloaded with sympathy, but the intense pain and sympathy I feel for her deep inside... That's family. This lady has been here for me through so much and now is my time to give back to her. She is such a kind, caring lady. She would give you the shirt off her back in the freezing cold if you needed it.
Sure the Hignight family and my family are different in many ways. My family is alway thirty minutes early and the Hignight's ..well they are closer to on time but there is never a dull moment with them (nor my family) so many laughs and memories and I can't wait to join that :)

Just keep swimming!

Somewhere in the middle of this semester I lost track of time. I'm so glad it has flown by I am so close to having E in the same city as myself. I've been working full time and going to school full time and I am really starting to feel it (don't misconstrue this as complaining) I am so blessed to have the job I have and the boss I have. I lucked out by getting this job. I work some strenuous hours but with only two cashiers at the moment that is to be expected.I enjoy my job, I mean my life goal isn't to see wings but for now its a reasonable job with good hours and pay to get through school.
I've been overwhelmed the past few days, not in a bad way, just realizations that are sinking in. when I verbalize I'm overwhelmed I feel sort of silly for being overwhelmed when I think about what all my friends are going through in their life. My silly little realizations such as I'm moving in January (I still don't think it has really sunk in yet. ) and the fact I'm getting married in a year are mind blowing. I will miss my family I know but I am excited about the new adventures and beginning the rest of my life with my best friend.
Another overwhelming thought....school. I becoming more aware lately that nursing may have just been a dream of mine but now Gods plan for me. I am happy with being a medical assistant I really am. I think it really is where my heart lies. The more I pursue and finish my Spanish minor the more I realize I'm in LOVE withthe language an the culture. The more I pray the more I realize I want to be completely bilingual. I am finding myself wondering if I have been wasting these years of nursing on a selfish dream instead of realizing it's my Spanish major I am supposed to be getting so I can live in a bilingual city (Orlando) and so I can use Spanish in medicine as a medical assistant or patient care assistant or in whatever other capacity God has for me down the road. It's hard to acknowledge that you have chased a dream blindly bc you wanted it. Well let me modify I feel like my nursing isn't to be done at Memphis. Ive been pondering nursing at Concorde in Tampa. I'm just not sure however (prayers appreciated) so now I struggle with the decision of whether or not to finish out ny Spanish major at memphis (to my understanding I would maybe be ab a year away. ) or just stop altogether (it hardly seems worth it to stop when I'm so close to something. I love Spanish I love my classes. It's the one class I never skip and the one I never check the clock or want to leave. I feel such a strong tug towards Spanish ( I really feel like it's the Holy Spirit) I know God will provide for His plan just waiting and praying and tomorrow it's final decision time. For now I just keep swimming!

"aholic"

For anyone who had to look twice at the title I do apologize for it does not say alcoholic just the ending of the word. I could be all proper and tell you what the suffix -aholic means but I don't feel like it :). I have discovered what my aholic is though....working. To deal with stress and problems I work. That's actually how I am at work today working a double. I volunteered. Why? Well the reason is two fold actually. 1. Because I would just be sitting at home like a lazy bum if I weren't 2. Bc I make money to pay bills and 3. Because it offers an escape to personal life's issues. (okay so that was 3 ...oops) I have a few things in my life I should take care of, none of them serious, just small, minute (tic tac sized if you will) things. My mind equates that too why deal with them when I could be at work. Sone of the things I need to deal with will hurt emotionally but need to be done. I guess I will jump on that this week. It's funny how we all deal with things differently. I have a good friend who just runs. I wish I could motivate myself to do that it's much healthier than working I bet! So today I an working 11-11 in an effort to put off what I shouldn't be. Don't worry this working all thetine thing isn't permanent! It will cease once I am back in my element (and after my boss hires some more cashiers there is just two of us right now)
I can't wait to be in my normal groove of things. I dint mind working and making money but I def don't canto become obsessive. After all, somewhere in here school and wedding planning must still fit. It will. One thing I have learned this semester is time management. Seriously, I plan time and multi task much more than I used too. I realized somewhere over the last few winks that I grew up in some respects. It seems like just yesterday I graduated from highschool and now it's been almost four years. I still have decisions to make and things to do but for now I am just an aholic...workaholic that is.

Work/School/Wedding Planning

The title sums up my life right now and I'm loving it. Sure, I would be a but happier if Eric were around but he isn't and I'm not going to fixate on that. Work truly has been my saving grace in striving not to focus on the fact Eric isn't here. I work at least 24 hours a week and am always willing to pick up peoples shifts or extend my own (good practice for Disney?) Right now I get alot of hours to myself as it is. We are down to two cashiers so I'm pretty much the night person and eat, sleep, and breathe work on the weekends (yay for having this Sunday off!!) It's really not a problem with me I need to start saving money and a good work ethic is never bad to have :)
School is in the process of coming to a close for the semester. I will be sad but thankful for a break. :) I plan on taking two online classes this spring while I'm at Disney in the spring. I love o lone classes. When I teach myself things they come MUCH quicker. I wish they weren't so expensive though and the only other con is you don't get to meet cool, interesting ppl like you actually get to do in a classroom setting.
I had my first meeting with mine and Erics wedding planner. This girl is so sweet and I am so honored she is planning it. Right now, my main focus is set a budget. This has been hard. I have had to really think about wants and needs, what's doable, and what's not really imperative. Basically, in the long run will it matter if "fill in the blank" was part of our wedding decor etc. I have already loved this journey :) the other day I told Eric we needed to go ahead and set a budget and his response was , "yes we do...how do we do that...?" I chuckled and shot him a text back teasing that we should ask Dave Ramsey.
I'm so thankful for modern technology so I can still keep in touch with my wonderful fiancé and have precious moments with him. I know I say it every post but I feel like this experience has grown and matured us so much, and also ha proven to us the saying "absence makes the heart grow fonder", is indeed true. Being apart give you a much deeper appreciation for the blessings you have in your life. I hope I never take Eric for granted but if I ever do I hope I remember back to this experience and how much he truly does mean to me. I try to tell him that everyday. I so yearn to want to he the wife to him God would have me to be :) I can't wait to see where He takes us on this wonderful journey. So much has been wonderful already and it's ONLY BEGINNING!
Well back to work :)

Friend is someone to share cookie with...

Ever since I was younger I have always taken a liking to this phrase penned by Cookie Monster. Yes the one from Sesame Street. Lately, I have been more thankful for friends than ever. In the time Eric has been gone I really do feel like I have strengthened some friendships in my life and made some new ones as well. It's during times like these when I am running around with my head chopped off it seems that I need friends to make me laugh, friends who need a listening ear and most importantly friends who tell me stuff I need to hear. That stuff that may not be what I want to hear but the stuff that I need to hear. Someone who loves me enough that they aren't afraid to tell me I am doing something stupid because they want the best for me.
I had lunch with one such friend today. I am so glad I met her back in high school. She is kind, caring, and best of all she can tell you what needs to be said and it always sounds so loving. Christ radiates from her and I don't think she has ever said one thing to me that was hurtful (even when she was telling me those things that I didn't want to hear.)
I have made a new friend this fall in another hip lady. She is so real and isn't afraid to speak her mind and I love that about her. She has had more in common with me then any other friend I have had in a while. I am sure I probably annoy her sometimes. She is that person I can be stupid and sing loudly with. Someone who I have opened up and shared my soul with, and although we have different views on things we accept each other for who we are and I think that is what is most beautiful to me about our friendship. :)
I am so glad God gave us friends and I am so glad He blessed me with a best friend that I get to spend the rest of my life with :) He exceeded my wildest expectations when He sent Eric my way all those years ago and all the waiting prior to dating payed off because now I get to fufill God's story for our lives with Eric.